It Was Love, Not Lust 3- Final

Another beer; another mind-dulling buzz.

Another smoke; another lung-killing dose of nicotine.

Another sigh; another sneeking tear.

Murdoc couldn't take this. Life without his singer just seemed so terribly depressing and wrong. He wanted desperately to go down to the basement and apologize- but he dare not. Since the incident about two weeks ago 2D had managed to get by with only a few clumsy bruises and marks instead of the usual abusive ones.

This was the only high-light in the bassist's life. Stu seemed just as broken as he did, but if he knew anything he knew the singer had a way of bouncing back to his usual bright and happy disposition. Murdoc, on the other hand, wasn't quite sure what would become of him.

He'd tried convincing himself that this whole thing was just a phase, perhaps a mid-life crisis or something. He wasn't really that in love with another man that he couldn't get over it.. was he? Murdoc groaned, cigarette smoke drifting from his mouth as he leaned against the Winnie door. The carpark seemed empty, cold and lifeless. Just like he did.

The man perked up slightly as the door a few yards of way creaked open and revealed a certain bluenette. Wide black eyes shot up to him, returning his gaze. Though Murdoc had mixed feelings about seeing the younger, 2D seemed only pleading and upset. He wasn't sure how things had been going with Muds, but lately his life had been empty and sad. He hadn't even gotten a decent nights sleep in the near two week period.

They stood there in a slightly awkward silence, neither moving other then Murdoc taking a drag on his fag and 2D taping his finger anxiously. A few involuntary tears welled up in the vocalist's eyes as he resisted the urge to runover to the older and hug him tightly like he used to. Murdoc seemed just as upset by the lack of contact, though he knew it was for the best.

2D, taking very slow steps, came a bti closer to him. "'e-ey, Muds.." His voice was hoarse and his cheeks wet. He'd been crying again.

"Stu." Murdoc replied, not feeling up to the usual name-calling.

The singer kept his hands close to his chest, his fingertips tapping against each other nervously. In all honesty he was expecting the bassist to ignore him.

"'ow.. 'ave fings been?" 2D asked quietly, coming a few uncertain steps closer.

Murdoc lowered his head, resting his forehead in his hand and sighed. "Terrible.. yew?"

He frowned even more-so then he already had been, replying, "yeh.. same he'e... ah've missed ya, Muds.." The dented man hoped that he might be able to get at least one hug before he was forced to leave again.

The older man rested his chin in his palm and studied the younger. "S'not going to wo'k, Stu. I's fo' tha best.."

"Tha best?" His eyes narrowed slightly as his stomach cringed at the thought. "Mu'doc.. look 't us.. yew'e goin ta dwink you'self ta deaf 'n ah 'aven' been able ta stop cwyin since.. since.." He trailed off, his throat choking up as he attempted not to cry in front of Murdoc.

Murdoc took another deep drag, his gaze now more of a glare. "'ave yew not wrealzed why ah did 'is yet??" He was now standing on the Bago steps, eye-level with the teary-eyed man.

"No, no ah 'aven! Ah 'aven' been able ta fink of a single good wreason yew of all people would put you'self frough 'is!!" 2D's voice was a low shout as he wiped at his eyes.

"Eet 'as nuthin ta do wif me, yew dumbarse!! Look at you'self! Yew dun 'ave a scratch on yew!!" Murdoc made a sharp motion at the younger's unharmed body as though to prove his point. Stu's eyes trailed down to himself then back up to Murdoc, a few of the tears trailing down his cheeks.

"..yew.. 'at's why..? b-but.." He was at a loss for words. 2D, even after the long two weeks he spent playing hundreds of senarios over and over in his head, not one of them actually had to do with anything close to this. He had truly thought Murdoc had done it for his own reputation or something equally as selfish, but this..

Murdoc nodded, turning to go inside. Now that the dullard knew he was more likely to leave him alone- right? That question was answered as his hand was taken in a softer, large one. The bassist closed his eyes, not turning around. The simple contact made his heart swell and his body to tingle slightly. "Wot, Pot?" He questioned without moving.

"Muds.. pwease look 't me."

With a forced glare he turned back to the younger man. Tears now ran down his pale cheeks, his large black eyes gazing into Murdoc's pleadingly. "Well?" The demonic bassist hissed, dropping his cigarette and squashing it beneath one of his cuban heeled boots.

2D whimpered, and, in a quick motion, pulled Murdoc into a tight embrace. He had his long, thin arms wrapped around him tightly, vaguely wondering it this would result in death. Murdoc stood there for a moment before hesitantly returning the embrace.

Their hearts were pounding and their faces hidden behind hair as they just stood there; enjoying the warmth neither had felt in far too long. 2D let out a quiet sob, burying his face in Murdoc's neck. He hadn't expected the other to return the embrace and it came as a huge relief.

"Please, Stu.. Dun' do 'is to you'self.." Murdoc pleaded softly, nuzzling the azure hair.

"Yew need 'is jus' as much as ah do," he whispered in reply, hugging him even tighter as though to prove his point.

The singer lifted his head back up, gently caressing Murdoc's cheek with his thumb as he gazed into the mismatched eyes. "Listen, mate.." He muttered, returning the soft look. 2D, not sure he wanted to hear what Murdoc had to say, leaned in and gently kissed him.

Murdoc pulled the thin body closer for a few seconds then withdrew, looking back into 2D's dark eyes a bit more seriously. "Listen to me, faceache."

"Awright.. wot?" 2D's tears had stopped for the most part, now only slipping past his cheeks every once in a while.

He sighed, taking a moment before saying, "mate.. yew know if yew stay yew'e goin ta get 'urt.."

"Yeh.. ah knew 'at fwom tha beginin.. but 'm ok wif eet." The singer rested his forehead against Murdoc's, offering a small, kind smile. The older man ruffled his hair lightly and let his eyes drift closed thoughtfully.

"Oh, 'n Stu?"

"Wot, Muds?"

"Ah.. ah love yew."